every rose has it's thorn.

I enjoy pouring my feelings out into seemingly meaningless words which will not help or change the situation which I am placed in.. Oh well.

I feel fucking awesome after writing all of that. Maybe I should make copies and leave them around school.

I could not be more thrilled than to watch the days slowly tick away until I graduate.. This year has been a fucking nightmare. I have never felt so miserable and alone in my entire life. Even if no one bothers to even glance past the title, this rant I am about to embark on will feel absolutely AMAZING. Since I was practically forced into quitting cheerleading, I have been so upset, miserable and alone beyond words. Because of my decision to walk away from the nasty bitter girls which were exceptionally hiding the fact that with each turn I made, they were thrusting a knife further and further into my back.. Until finally, I collasped.. Whatever the case - its in the past. Something I must grow from and learn from. I was going good until, BUT of course, my “friends” decided to fuck me sideways up the asshole.

Now these “friends” were girls I have known from pre-k, kindergarten, first grade.. All young ages. Yet when it came time to stand up or sit down and watch me burn, they sat down on the ground, covered their eyes, and crawled away. Good friends, right? More recently they all decided to become friends with some of my worst “enemies” and continuously put myself and my needs to the side..

All the times I dropped everything to listen to you bitch and moan about the problems which YOU created, all the times I ran to your side to help you, to take your side or to stand up for you clearly were meaningless and pointless to you.

I always considered myself to have high standards, however you must either just met those requirements, or slowly drifted below them. Whatever the case may be at this point, I dont give a fuck. I gave some of these people everything in me for nothing! For absolutely fucking nothing.. So heres a big fuck you. For all the shit people talked about you, damn straight they were right. AND another thing, you want to talk shit about MY relationship, well sweetie pie maybe you shouldnt have been cheating on your boyfriend through the duration of your relationship and you wouldn’t have an end result of a “broken heart”.. BOO FUCKING HOO

So for all you dumb bitches and cunts who continuously: beat me down, took advantage of my light heart, misused the word ‘friend’ or don’t own a dictionary in order to look up the word, talked shit about me, or pushed me to turn into some insane crazy bitch - karma will be knocking on your doors.. Or it’ll be me there ready to knock your fucking teeth out.. And trust me. I have no problem saying this to any  of your faces.

So fuck you? And have a nice day.

I had to quit my cheering team.. Why? Long story short, because of pathetic girls.. I need to vent this out of my heart because I’ve been losing my mind. I miss is so fuckin much it’s unreal.. Cheerleading has always been the biggest part of my life, and being athletic, I always viewed myself as excelling in it. Having to walk away from something I love more than life itself just proves to me how strong I am.. Honestly. I could’ve easily taken the bullshit every damn day and continued to chase my dreams, instead I redirected them.
I learned more about myself in 12 seasons flipping and flying through the air in a short skirt than I had in my entire life.
So ya know what? Fuck it, I’ll compete again, and be a bigger, stronger, happier person in the end.
So thanks for making me a fighter ;)